Living in a desert

Most people don’t know that the climate in Beijing is pretty similar to being in a desert. No, really.

To give you an example, I have three humidifiers going in the house (bedroom, den and living room) and each has a capacity for six litres before needing to be refilled.

I REFILL THEM ALL THREE TIMES A DAY.

And still, I wake up with cracked lips and sometimes a bloody nose.

Because of this extreme dryness, the doctor has told me I need to drink an insane amount of water every day. But here’s the thing, my bladder is shrinking so I have to go to the bathroom like every five minutes.

Also, on a completely random note, my belly button is stretching out and looking weird. It’s kind of freaking me out.

BAD DOG

This little terror just ate my kniting needles. Good thing he’s adorable.

Sometimes I’m crazy

I can’t believe I’m up at 7:30 a.m., much less going to work (a small contract, not REAL work).

Why do I agree to these things?

Urgh.

Waiting for the glow

I’ve finally passed the 13-week mark and am in my 2nd trimester, and after seeing the doctor a couple days ago and seeing that the baby was good and healthy (and hearing the heartbeat on the Doplar), Hubby and I breathed a collective sigh of relief. And then we posted the ultrasound pictures on Facebook because that’s what classy grown-up people do these days.

It feels great to finally be able to tell people about the pregnancy and not keep it a secret anymore. What’s even better is that all of a sudden, I’m hungry again and not only that, but food looks and smells good again too. And I can stay up past 9 p.m.! That’s pretty amazing as well. I’m sure I’ve been a pretty boring wife the last couple months; pecking at cereal, then napping, then sipping at soup, then going to bed. And in the spare time when I was awake, all I did was complain about how constipated I was.

There’s only two more things I’m waiting for; a bump and that great pregnant glow everyone talk about. So far, my skin has reverted back to a stage of adolescence that I would prefer to forget called My Skin Hates Me. Urgh. I’m dreading our Christmas trip to Australia because I’m breaking out on my back, of all places. Like, really? What the hell is THAT all about?

I WANT THE GLOW!!!

Oh yes I am

Listening to Christmas music and dancing around the house.

A return of my appetite is surely worth this celebration.

Let me tell you about being pregnant and having sex

(Because someone posted a comment about it and I can’t respond to comments.)

Hubby and I have had sex about three times since I got pregnant. Why? Well, at first (in the beginning at 4-5 weeks) I would get really bad cramps after sex and that freaked me out because severe cramping is a sign of miscarriage. So we stopped.

And then I got nauseous. And tired. And now my belly is growing and it’s uncomfortable and the positions we CAN do it in (use your imagination) make me want to vomit because I’m moving around too much.

Maybe some women get all horny when they’re pregnant but personally I think it’s a myth. I think most pregnant woman feel like their bodies are being taken over my an alien and there’s nothing really sexy about that.

Plus, the exhaustion. You completely underestimate how tired you’re going to be all the time. I mean, when you think about it, my body has grown a couple cells into what is now the size of a peach, a little person with little organs all working away.

I’m tired just thinking about it.

Warning: Pregnancy hormones in full swing

I’m having one of those days where I’m doubting everything. Okay, not everything. Only one very specific thing. Hubby. It started today when I was fooling around online and plugged in data for our Chinese horoscope compatibility. The result? Completely incompatible. Of all of the Chinese signs, we are the two LEAST likely to work long-term. The site said, "You are two different people who will always feel like you are compromising yourselves just to get along."

So I did what any other hormonal pregnant woman would do. I cried.

And then I started re-thinking the last six months of my life. Should I have accepted the proposal? Should we have gotten married? Should I have gotten pregnant? Will he be a good father? Why hasn’t he stopped smoking yet? DOESN’T HE CARE ABOUT THIS BABY!?!?!?

And then I cried again.

It’s 8 p.m. and Hubby still isn’t home from work, Puppy is being a brat and I just can’t deal with it right now. I’m ignorning him, which of course makes him go, "OMG, what can I do to get her attention? Eat her shoes? Eat this bill? Rip this pillow?" I want to sink into a hot bath (but not too hot cause that’s not good for the baby) with a glass of wine (which of course I won’t do) and pretend I’m 20-years-old again and don’t have to deal with any of this stuff.

I’m also constantly starving, but don’t want to eat stupid Chinese food, I want food from HOME. I want pizza from HOME. I want tex mex food from HOME. I WANT TO GO HOME AND GORGE MYSELF ON HOME FOOD. But I can’t. And I’m starving. And nothing looks good to eat. And I’m getting fat but losing weight at the same time. All of a sudden I can’t sleep at night because my body isn’t my body anymore – things are moving around in there and it’s NOT COMFORTABLE.

I WANT HUBBY TO STOP SMOKING AND HE WON’T AND IT MAKES ME WANT TO PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE.

Sweet Baby Jesus, I really am pregnant.

Almost, but not quite

I went to a local Irish pub for lunch today and ordered Shepherd’s Pie mostly because I wanted the mashed potatoes and was too lazy to make some for myself.

The pie comes and underneath the mashed potatoes, there is spaghetti sauce.

I’m so used to these little oddities about China that they don’t really bother me anymore. I just shrugged my shoulders and ate the spaghetti sauce.

Just another one of those ‘China Moments’.

I am slowly dying

So I caught a cold. Usually this wouldn’t really be the end of the world, but the thing is pregnant women can’t take very many medications when they’re sick because they’re bad for baby. The medications I CAN take, I don’t have access to in China. So basically, I’m feel like I’m dying a slow and painful death as this cold moves into my sinuses. Yesterday, the only relief I had was when I tied a hot water bottle to my head in an effort to melt the gunk in my sinuses.

Yes, picture that if you will. I tied a hot water bottle to my head.

I’m spending my days moaning in pain and watching Stargate Atlantis (almost done Season 3), with a hot water bottle strapped to my face.

Oh, and this cold seems to have triggered my morning sickness, so I’m also vomiting all the time.

I’m not loving being pregnant right now, let me tell you.

So maybe I’m an aunt

I don’t know if I ever posted about this, but nine months ago, my brother had a one-night-stand with a girl who said she was on The Pill and I guess they didn’t use condoms because low and behold, she called him afterwards and said she was pregnant. This girl, it turns out, also slept with my best friend’s boyfriend before my brother and pulled the same stunt. Told him she was on The Pill, they had sex, she said she was pregnant. In an email exchange with my best friend, this girl admitted to wanting a baby and trying to get pregnant.

The sad part is that this girl has no permanent job, no family and no friends. I would call her white trash, but she may be the mother of my future nephew so I’ll reserve nasty comments.

Anyway, at ultrasounds (that my mother went to because OMG she was going to be a grandma!), the technician said that the baby was two weeks older than what it could be if it was my brothers. Now, I’ve been to one of these ultrasounds and they pinpointed the exact day that I conceived. So, ummm. Suspicious.

Throughout this pregnancy my brother has been kind of a mess. I mean, he’s 25-years-old and he’s been entrapped into potentially being a father FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE because he had a one-night-stand with a girl who was out to get pregnant. Because I’m sorry, if there’s an ‘accident’ (by accident I mean they were too drunk to use condoms), she should have gone to the pharmacy to get the morning after pill, which is what a normal person would have done.

I feel for my brother, I really do. But, he’s made some impressive changes in his life should this child be his. He’s applied for and gotten a great promotion at work and now works in an office closer to his house – it’s snapped him out of being a kid. She’s had minimal contact with him for nine months – and my brother hasn’t really made an effort to contact her. I mean, he hardly knows her and until there’s a paternity test, it could be anyone’s baby, so why get emotionally involved?

Fast-forward to last Sunday, and she’s had the baby (a boy!) but now she’s backing out of doing a paternity test because she’s not comfortable with it.

W00t?!?

Oh, but she still wants money from my brother.

I’ve spoken with my brother and told him no court will make him pay child support unless there’s a paternity test and to let her threaten away but until a lab confirms that he’s the father, he doesn’t owe her shit. (I’ve asked several lawyers about this.)

*sigh*

All of this makes me wonder what kind of girl would deliberately go out and get pregnant when she has no means of supporting herself, no job, and no family for support. What was missing in her life that she felt could only be filled with a child? Whatever it is, I think she’ll soon realize that the baby won’t make her whole again and the real loser in this scenario is the baby.

Unless, of course, this baby is my nephew. And then I’m going to be my damn best to make sure he knows what the word ‘family’ means.